T: I totally get it about the A2 thing. I think I really pick up on her feelings for you and maybe that's why I felt the need to question if I was wrong in my prediction. I feel very strongly that she feels VERY strongly about you! I know you know this, but I think it's actually stronger than you even realize. Not to complicate your situation or anything!!
BH: well, apparently, as dense as she is about the energetic level, others certainly do seem to pick up on A2's feelings!! Today, in a nondemanding, but totally honest way, A2 did make it clear that she's ready and very much interested in a "significant other" relationship with me. She reviewed the last year together and all the mutual support and learning... how much fun and enjoyment we find together. Etc. And I am very, very tempted. I do care for her a great deal. And I am questioning myself about foregoing the potential based on the possible astrological issues. Yes, I think B and I, esp based on Rosemary's reading, could have a great thing... but, probably not right now....
B has suddenly taken a turn toward withdrawal -- and I'm certain it's because she picks up energetically on A2's feelings.... In fact, A2 had been doing a great deal of thinking and planning and talking about with her cousin and her half-sister about me and how to tell me how she feels and such over the last few days... and I think B picked that up. That, and the fact that in a week, I'll be more in A2's proximity than I have been lately.... and B finds that threatening..... and, if I'm honest, I'm not all that ambivalent toward A2. She seems to be taking me for who I am, as I am.... She's a lovely, loving person.....
I have to confess, I am very much considering letting things go to a more serious point with A2....
B and I have a lot of common interests -- camping and hiking, for instance, that I won't be doing with A2 (but could with TC, as she's got those same interests as well.....) And, on a metaphysical level, Beth has already helped me be even more comfortable with that aspect of the universe..... There's a lot to be gained and learned by a relationship of some sort with her, but with this latest "shying away", I'm leaning hard toward just putting that situation on a friendship basis.....
Irony is, I had been leaning the other way, but this weekend is the latest of several unexpected withdrawal behaviors on B's part.... I'm kind of feeling like it's just not time for that one after all. Maybe later in this lifetime, maybe in another.... But, I'm feeling a bit like I might ought to just put that one on an "occasional keeping of company" basis.... I was trying to convince myself that I should keep Linda on a friendship -- nonsexual basis -- but now, I'm really feeling like there's just WAY too much baggage and doubt inside of Beth for a "preference" toward her to be entirely appropriate at this point.
So, you've sort of touched where I was leaning.... treading lightly.... She is very sensitive, on several levels..... She doesn't know about TC, since that was on the non-contact path while B has been part of my life.... But, I have to say, I'm more comfortable with the idea of dealing with my very good friend who became more, A2, should TC re-surface, than I am by the idea of what might transpire if Beth and I become more involved and then TC comes back into the picture....
I guess my trouble is, I find it too easy almost to love. I could fall in love with B, or with A2, or with TC, or even with you..... and I care deeply about treating women I care for with great grace and kindness......
I think things are still early enough with B to allow for keeping things very light.... and she won't find that terribly hurtful..... OTOH, if we were involved as we could get, and then TC came into it.... B would be greatly, greatly troubled.....
Bottom line is, B, for various reasons is being really hot / cold -- flaky toward me.... I'm not sure I care to jump on such an emotional roller coaster as that....
at this moment, I'm rather inclined to go ahead with the A2 thing and let it play out its course as it will.
hmmmmmm.......
Monday, July 21, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
message back to my intuitive
this message almost is a journal entry so I'm dropping it into my journal.
Hi BH,
T: I've been sooo busy! My horse tore his MCL (ligament) so I've spent an average of 8-10 hours a day at the barn for the past 6 weeks icing and bandaging him on and off. 50% chance of recovery from this.
B: Sometimes I'd love to have a horse myself, but for all the money and trouble.
I do hope it goes well.
T: I got your message also, regarding A2. I'd like to talk to you about this because maybe she could be the one afterall? I'm not sure where your feelings are for her. I should have a little more availability this
BH: I don't really recall what I said in my message. I've been keeping communication with A2 kind of minimal this week. I have become quite interested in pursuing a further relationship of some kind with B (however deep or long it may or may not be....). And I went down to A2's last Sunday afternoon (which B knew about and tried to be accepting about but was a little troubled by.... even though she knew my purpose was to clarify with A2 my intent to keep things at a friendship basis, and that without the "benefits" (much as I might like to indulge now and then, LOL).
Anyway, A2's thinking has been shifting toward MORE involvement between us even as mine has moved toward being careful to keep it where it is at.... She had difficulty hearing me, apparently, that I've been seeing a lot of B and am quite interested in her..... and even though A2 has been encouraging me to find others, etc, etc, Monday morning she let me know clearly she was ready to move ours up a notch.... I danced around that as best I could and have been real cautious about her the rest of the week.
She's my best friend and I greatly fear hurting her (more than this week has). But, without the guidances, I've come to realize that she has a lot of unresolved issues with true intimacy and relationships. She is extroverted, yes, but her self-esteem, ESP re relationships, is terrible. I think pursuing an actual, serious relationship with her, without her having dealt with those things, would only lead to great hurt (as the relationship would not likely last) and would end the friendship, or course.
When I add to that your guidance toward caution re: A2, Rosemary's very clear indications that that's a relationship to just have fun with -- more would tend toward problems -- and Christine's guidance (the same -- don't get too serious, don't go too far).... I am very comfortable about not going further than this strong friendship with A2. Even though my heart absolutely aches at the idea that I may (be) hurt her.
Meanwhile, Rosemary did B's chart for me yesterday. LOTS of good potential there. Likely some other/past like connection. Good potential for a great relationship there..... but will take time to develop. For one, B is still very cautious due to her last relationship, as am I in many ways.... for another, B senses that my heart may not be fully available and that I may not have acheived all the healing I need to yet.... not to mention, she's cautious about my "Scorpio moon" and her own heart! Anyway, Rosemary seems to think it will continue to unfold on through Sept and then maybe go some place.
BUT, then there's the TC factor. Rosemary drew cards on that situation, too. You and she remain convinced that TC and I have some future together.... She sees TC as finally coming back into the picture in late August, having finally dealt with some issues and realizing they were hers, not others, and asking herself about why she quit talking to me when it was enjoyable.... and starting the connection back up....
Sooooo.. let's see here. I have myself in a roil over A2's feelings for me. I still wonder about TC. She may come back into the picture in the middle of my trying to pursue some greater connection and relationship with B, who is also quite compatible chart-wise..... Maybe I should just back away from them all!!
Huge sigh.... (and suppressing a flirty comment about you.....LOL)
T: week. I've been so swamped since my horse got hurt trying to manage him and still ride another horse, take clients, take care of the kids since they don't have school and oh yea, I have a husband too! :) I'll try to give you a call when I'm going back and forth to the barn. I usually have about 10 minutes at a time.
BH: I've been ousted from my union presidency and am working at a regular job now. I can take a call if I am not occupied, but this week's day times has some crazy stuff in it.... so we may have a challenge getting each other. Evenings work, after 5:30 and somewhat early (because after 8:30 or so B and I are often together). Mornings, I'm generally up by 7 or 7:30 on my way to work at 8:45
Thanks. and best to you and your horse and all. /BH
Take care,
T
Hi BH,
T: I've been sooo busy! My horse tore his MCL (ligament) so I've spent an average of 8-10 hours a day at the barn for the past 6 weeks icing and bandaging him on and off. 50% chance of recovery from this.
B: Sometimes I'd love to have a horse myself, but for all the money and trouble.
I do hope it goes well.
T: I got your message also, regarding A2. I'd like to talk to you about this because maybe she could be the one afterall? I'm not sure where your feelings are for her. I should have a little more availability this
BH: I don't really recall what I said in my message. I've been keeping communication with A2 kind of minimal this week. I have become quite interested in pursuing a further relationship of some kind with B (however deep or long it may or may not be....). And I went down to A2's last Sunday afternoon (which B knew about and tried to be accepting about but was a little troubled by.... even though she knew my purpose was to clarify with A2 my intent to keep things at a friendship basis, and that without the "benefits" (much as I might like to indulge now and then, LOL).
Anyway, A2's thinking has been shifting toward MORE involvement between us even as mine has moved toward being careful to keep it where it is at.... She had difficulty hearing me, apparently, that I've been seeing a lot of B and am quite interested in her..... and even though A2 has been encouraging me to find others, etc, etc, Monday morning she let me know clearly she was ready to move ours up a notch.... I danced around that as best I could and have been real cautious about her the rest of the week.
She's my best friend and I greatly fear hurting her (more than this week has). But, without the guidances, I've come to realize that she has a lot of unresolved issues with true intimacy and relationships. She is extroverted, yes, but her self-esteem, ESP re relationships, is terrible. I think pursuing an actual, serious relationship with her, without her having dealt with those things, would only lead to great hurt (as the relationship would not likely last) and would end the friendship, or course.
When I add to that your guidance toward caution re: A2, Rosemary's very clear indications that that's a relationship to just have fun with -- more would tend toward problems -- and Christine's guidance (the same -- don't get too serious, don't go too far).... I am very comfortable about not going further than this strong friendship with A2. Even though my heart absolutely aches at the idea that I may (be) hurt her.
Meanwhile, Rosemary did B's chart for me yesterday. LOTS of good potential there. Likely some other/past like connection. Good potential for a great relationship there..... but will take time to develop. For one, B is still very cautious due to her last relationship, as am I in many ways.... for another, B senses that my heart may not be fully available and that I may not have acheived all the healing I need to yet.... not to mention, she's cautious about my "Scorpio moon" and her own heart! Anyway, Rosemary seems to think it will continue to unfold on through Sept and then maybe go some place.
BUT, then there's the TC factor. Rosemary drew cards on that situation, too. You and she remain convinced that TC and I have some future together.... She sees TC as finally coming back into the picture in late August, having finally dealt with some issues and realizing they were hers, not others, and asking herself about why she quit talking to me when it was enjoyable.... and starting the connection back up....
Sooooo.. let's see here. I have myself in a roil over A2's feelings for me. I still wonder about TC. She may come back into the picture in the middle of my trying to pursue some greater connection and relationship with B, who is also quite compatible chart-wise..... Maybe I should just back away from them all!!
Huge sigh.... (and suppressing a flirty comment about you.....LOL)
T: week. I've been so swamped since my horse got hurt trying to manage him and still ride another horse, take clients, take care of the kids since they don't have school and oh yea, I have a husband too! :) I'll try to give you a call when I'm going back and forth to the barn. I usually have about 10 minutes at a time.
BH: I've been ousted from my union presidency and am working at a regular job now. I can take a call if I am not occupied, but this week's day times has some crazy stuff in it.... so we may have a challenge getting each other. Evenings work, after 5:30 and somewhat early (because after 8:30 or so B and I are often together). Mornings, I'm generally up by 7 or 7:30 on my way to work at 8:45
Thanks. and best to you and your horse and all. /BH
Take care,
T
Love life a challenge
Out of town woman A2, having become my best friend, wants to be more finally -- but we're not really compatible astrologically, and she's got deeper issues to deal with than she realizes or seems willing to face.
Local woman very interesting and interested. But cautious. Astrologically compatible. Probably a past / other life (or several) connection.
Way out of town woman peeved at me last Spring, I'm told will come to grips with her issues and come back into the picture.... It's a mess.
I have the first one on my mind a lot (A2) as I am trying not to hurt her....
Local woman very interesting and interested. But cautious. Astrologically compatible. Probably a past / other life (or several) connection.
Way out of town woman peeved at me last Spring, I'm told will come to grips with her issues and come back into the picture.... It's a mess.
I have the first one on my mind a lot (A2) as I am trying not to hurt her....
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