Last Sunday night she indicated she'll be up here on Friday, wanted to get together and "just talk". Bad idea.... That can only lead to more hurt feelings or issues.
She even went so far as to broach coming up on Thursday (to stay over with me) to better accommodate her need to see me and talk.... an even worse idea.
I've emailed her, regretfully trying to make it very clear that there isn't any going back... I'm moving on and moving forward.
The truth is, I don't have to and don't intend to cut off contact forever. Not like I had to with M. I don't feel abused, or feel like there is a lot of negative to make sure doesn't arise.... or pathology (well, other than A2's difficulty with deeper emotional connection).
I would tell her that, again, but now is not the time. Not while she continues to have hope of "putting things back together".
Better if I just fall silent with her for now.
It will be tough enough seeing one another at a meeting a week from Friday.... That is cause for a little trepidation. Not because something unpleasant may occur, but because it will still be a raw wound -- really, for both of us.
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