Truly beyond

M walks in last night, all smiley, almost 10 p.m..... "I came home because I miss you and I want to make love with you."

what????!!! I'm thinking, this is just out there. All the conflict that I left FL under. All the conflict we'd been having when we touch base since. And this??

I had mostly left her be, turning my phone off and such. She used that as an excuse for surprising me. "I tried to call you, but you had your phone off and the land line off hook so I couldn't reach you...." "I didn't book the flight until yesterday..."

"I DID leave a message that 'I had a question'"

I recall that. It was during the stuff referenced in my entry of http://bpdoz.blogspot.com/2007/04/hard-to-ignore-her-but-im-trying.html describing the night before. And her "question" message was edgy and of a negative tone. Not something I was anxious to respond to.

But somehow, SHE shook all that off by Wednesday and went ahead and made her flight arrangements. For purposes, as she's stated them that seem terribly inappropriate.

It was tempting. I knew what she wanted. She's still quite beautiful and we make wonderful love together when we're connected in that way... But, still, to expect to walk in, completely unexpectedly, with virtually every recent communication being conflicted and literally have the orchestra come up and the couple fall into rapturous love.... is a bit much.