Notes from M

Dated 2/6/07 (composed day / night after the big blow out)

sticky note on top: You don't have to read this -- but but I have had lots of time to think about it -- SO you might want to give it a quick look.

Handwritten (and apparently copied on the fax machine at home -- bottom of pages cut off and unreadable....) (any comments I have are bracketed).

1. You apparently -- no you give lip service to "understanding" what my thrumb surgery has done to me -- including totally "forgetting" that/sorry) I am currently unable to open bottles and jars except sometimes I can manage if I use my teeth. Thanks.
2.Try to imagine yourself in this house by yourself, left with some cheese, crackers, and water -- and on a good day some micro meals -- with nobody to talk to -- except -- on a good day -- a couple of 30 second weather warnings via cell phone. [this is a reference to several phone calls M made to me yesterday p.m., starting before I had a chance to call her on a friendly basis -- calls that I took with good grace and on a friendly basis ].
3. Imagine the above for anywhere between 10-13 or more hours and then imagine being crabbed at because you feel depressed, alone, and unimportant. Can you imagine that?
4. Imagine bing hngry for "real " food but being unable to fix it for yourself and being unable to actually feed yourself without help that you'd expect a toddler to need.
5. Imagine living with chronic acute pain for 18 or more months because it was inconvenient to deal wit it in a more timely manner. Imagine that.
6. I'm not blaming you. I'm the totally stupid one because all that I have put into and done here at [our address] ...I will never reap any rewards or monetary compensation. I simply did what I thouth "we" wanted done to make the property a nice place to spedn time -- togeter -- but then you got very busy with work and resented that (and still resent) I have chosen to make sure thatany time you are available that I don't have any conflicting commitments. Do you -- will you ever appreciate or understand that? Duh, NO. You hold it against me and find it so ...... [cut off at bottom of page]