Split to the good / white

Thought of this passage in the book Boomerang Love as the last day or two unfolded:

(adapted)

"She was smiling again. L must have done something (unknowingly) that allowed her to be SPLIT GOOD again and placed back on the overvaluation pedistal. Little does L know how shaky that pedestal is.

I wonder if L -- and all of us in relationshiops with BPDs--need to realistically accept that we will always live under the knife --just a few steps away from traumatic pain over which we have no control.

All control is really in the hands of the BPD partner. Try as we might, we can't see inside their heads to know what's REALLY going on in there, to protect ourselves in advance of their actions.

I wonder if we'll ever REALLY BE SAFE.... I wonder.... "


and my comment to that is that it certainly does encapsulate the experience and danger of being the one split to the good. However, I DO know how shaky being on that pedestal is!!

And, constantly living "under the knife" is exactly how I feel... whether I show it to her or not.