things I just read that strike me.
End of chapter 5, "Path of Awareness"
"No more will you [people like me] disbelieve the obvious and believe the improbable. In the futuere, your anger will make you intolerant of being explointed and used."
RE: negative partners trying to remain connected by anger:
"stuck anger could be a type of negative intimacy in a trauma bond. By blaming the other for the problems in her life, the blaming partner can prevent the actual acceptance of the loss of the relationship...... Helathy anger expresses limitations -- ie, what is acceptable and what is not. Blaming anger recycles the history of betrayal and all the intense feelings that are part of a trauma bond. It is a negative way to keep the old person around.
Speaking to my heart again, "To finally grieve means to accept that your life did not turn out the way you wanted, the way you deserved or the way it should have."
"Those who are trauma-bonded have to accept not only the reality of compusive relationships, but also the accumulated losses in their lieves...."
"You have a responsibility to do somthing about it now. You are responsible for your behavior. "
Finallyk, the Greek story of Orestes who did not blame family, life, or anything else for his cicumstance, but took responsility, found a healing.... and found that the things that had once caused him agony became the same things that brought him wisdom. [the Furies were transformed into the Eumendies, the three sourdcdes of wisdom.]
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