And, then there's dissociation

Dissociation. Partly from the BPD, partly bipolar, partly post-tramatic stress. Whatever. M has a strong tendency..... Usually either prompted by high stress and a serious dysphoric reaction or alcohol -- and often a combo of the both.

Such may be the case post-Saturday night. Last night, after the Saturday / wee hours Sunday shananigans (where she angrily burst in to the bedroom at 2 a.m. and ranted for another couple hours downstairs -- fracturing my sleep, that's for sure -- she said something that almost surprised me.....

Mind you, this was after a relatively peaceful Sunday, of all things. There was an episode early in the day where she got extremely frustrated and upset. Then, that followed by her showering, getting dressed, and wanting to go somewhere, anywhere, out of the house -- mostly to get something to eat. I asked if she wanted me to drive, and she said, "yes, please". That was a turning point. From that point, her mood shifted toward me being split white / positive. She clearly felt cared for and taken care of -- although, all I did was be courteous and supportive.... When we got home, we even engaged in some companionable game of madlibs.

Evening went well too.....

But, interestingly.... at nearly 10 p.m., when I'm normally getting tired... and all the moreso after a night like the previous night -- I commented I was getting tired and going to go up to bed soon.....

She said, without rancor, "Didn't you get almost 11 hours of sleep last night?".

Which leads me to believe her primary memory of Saturday night was that I went to bed around 10 p.m. and got up around 9 a.m.....

It would appear she either has little recall of the rest (dissociation) or is conveniently forgetting it.... Probably a blend of both.

But, it was peaceful and friendly to the end yesterday, and even starting out today. A welcome change.